Saturday, February 21, 2009

Life is a runaway train you can't wait to jump onnnnnn

I didnt get to bed until super late last night. and then I slept until 2pm. yay.

Work was good last night. I made almost 600 bucks! Yipppeeee =) It was snowing all night too so I thought for sure the club was doomed as everyone would want to stay home and out of the bad weather. But it was pretty busy and everyone was very nice to me and complimentry. It was nice! When it was time to leave people were saying that the roads were super icy and everyone should drive very carefuln (I drive an hour up the highway home). To my suprise the roads were completely fine!!!!! Leave it to Coloradoans to freak out over a little snow.

B was riding his 4x4 yesterday out in the feild and he melted the rubber on his pants to the hot pipe on the 4 wheeler....bummer. This morning we tried everything we had in the shed to get it off (including a heat gun) nothing was working so I called up the 4x4 shop and they suggested trying "Oven-Off". You know, oven cleaner..... so we got some, spray it on, and Voila! It wiped right off :) yay. Shiny new chrome pipe we just gotta get him some new pants :)

I am working again tonight and I hope it goes as well as last night....

Sorry that I never have any interesting stripper stories for ya'll. I guess when something weird happens I just try to forget about it and go on with my night in a good mood. I'll will try to keep my blog in mind though whenever anything weird happens hahaaa...

Oh wait!!!!!! I do have 1 semi-weird thing. I have this regular named S. He comes in every Friday and gives me cash and we hang out blah blhaaaa. So he hasnt been in in almost a month!! WTF. Anyway, yesterday he texted me that he was in Las Vegas. because he has a 2Hour fuck session planned with professional escort, Nikki Avalon. *grumble* Good for him, seeing as that I would NEVER fuck him and he knows it....but uggghhh don't tell me about your sordid affairs dude. I know he just tells me to get me jealous- but really all it does it FREAK ME OUT about him more. Hes a habitual escort/massage parlor visitor. A little sad, if u ask me :(

Till next time


Thursday, February 19, 2009


I have a bad habit of getting bored and wanting to shop. There really isn't anything I need I just want to go spend the money. so so bad.

I just completely paid of my credit card and so now I feel like I "deserve" to spend 400 bucks shopping online! NOooooooo Natalie.

I keep telling myself that I should reward myself by not charging up my card again this month and therefore not having a bill to pay next month ..... lol

I am slowly getting better. All I have been doing is dosing up on NyQuil, sleeping and eating.

I am going to work Friday and Saturday, and I am actually pretty excited about it. My last shift was really good and maybe I am just tired of sitting around the house...either way, I'm happy to go and that's something that hasn't happened in a long long while.

Another thing I have been thinking about lately is my house decor. I cant stand it!!!!!!! We live in an old rental its not like I want to redo the entire fucking house but damn! You guys- I have bunny rabbit wallpaper in my kitchen. It makes me wanna puke every time I walk in there. B keeps promising that he will talk to the landlord about making some renovations and taking down the horrid wallpaper and putting a fresh coat of white down...but....i don't think he actually has. Brian's take on it is that I should be happy about the rent I am paying (only 825/month, which is CHEAP for where we live), and i should keep in mind that other than the few things that bother me, its a really gorgeous house in a perfect spot.

ugh. i dunno.

my woman instincts to re decorate are driving me crazy

when i was a kid i used to re arrange my room on a weekly basis.

NOW I feel like I'm living in a hippy house. I mean- i have a poster of bob Marley hanging in my kitchen still.

When I try to do small things to make myself happier like take down the bob Marley poster b will say "WTF wheres my poster?" He notices every time!!!! He had an old dusty Coors Light neon sign (no joke) hanging above my fireplace for the longest week when he was away on a trip, I took it down and hung some family pictures up instead...I thought about throwing the Coors light sign away but I could just hear him "@$#@%" Sooo, I put it underneath the couch for storage..... as soon as he got home he noticed right away, "wtf whatd u do with my sign??" i said "don't u think this picture of our family looks better?" i told him of course i didn't toss it it was under the couch and i said "damn u seem reeeeaally worried about that neon sign!" he said it reminds him of his childhood blah llha blah childhood drinking beer?! lol

I told him the next house we live in please please I must take control over the decorating...its my female right...and he said ok i can but i have to stop complaining about how we live now.


I'm picky I guess. but damn!!!!

I went on and they have soooooooooooooo many beautiful pictures of professionally designed rooms! Jealous!!!

One day I will have the home of my dreams and he will have an entire basement to hang his dusty old beer signs and plug in his Lava lamps. Ill be glad when I never have to look at them again!!!!!!!!!!!!

One of my new Favorite websites: LOVE IT! Its like eating without the calories =) Another: this is a very popular food website that I have grown to love love lOVE. Its the first page I visit every morning after my email =)

OH! And I really need to start working out again. B got me a gift certificate to my favorite tanning salon so maybe I will go tan tomorrow before work.....really I think I would feel the best if I had been working out this whole time....

I just really cant get motivated! How does everyone else do it?

My main problem I think is I stay up late and sleep in. Today I woke up at 2 in the afternoon! Not good. But when I get home from work at 3 then I have to wind down and shower and everything it is probably 5 am my sleep gets all messed up. It was gorgeous out today too I should've just GOT UP and took a nice refreshing shower, thrown some clothes on and went for a walk! But I didn't so......blaahh.

Sorry about my randomness- I sometimes leave my blogger up all day and just write every so often when I feel the urge. I realize I can be a bit confusing if you don't know me personally (or even when you do know me personally hahahaaa!)

Right now my B is on the couch next to me sleeping with the fur babies all curled up next to him sleeping too. aww. I am grateful =)

Tonight we watched this crazy movie with Leonardo DiCaprio called "Body of Lies" Meh, its loooong and boring. I got on my laptop to tinker around and B fell asleep. So there ya go.

Tonight for dinner I made Asiago cheese and Bacon stuffed Pork Chops with sweet corn and white cheddar mashed potatoes mmmmmmmmmm. It was delicious!!!!! Every last crumb was enjoyed!! I shoulda took a picture it was so gorgeous looking!

(going back to my lazy non working out fat ass)

ok i am not a fat ass. but i LOOOOVE food. Im Italian, therefore, I spent more time in the kitchen growing up than most kids I hung out with. I loved it. I hate dieting and I will never stop eating pasta and cheese and wine and all the yummy things in life.

With that said I have to get serious about working out!! LOL. Especially since dancing around half naked is my job :P BOO!

THIS is terrible...

Poor Patrick Swayze is dying of cancer...
I know lots of people die of cancer everyday, and I feel for them also, but my heart just breaks seeing this photo of him.

Man I kind of wish I was at work right now....I feel like crap and I know I shouldn't be there but whenever I get a dash of motivation I feel like I should be using it! Instead of sitting here rambling on....

Tuesday, February 17, 2009


So for the last two night I have tossed and turn aand woke up feeling like SHIT! I think its because I can feel a draft coming in the window right by my head when I sleep! Ack!

The worst part of not being able to breathe through your nose is that you must breathe through your mouth and i turn, my mouth is SOOOO dry. Ew! Not fun damnit.

Anyway, I have been pumped up on the Nyquil for a few days and I suppose I will take some more in a bit......ahhhhhhhh!!!

Sunday, February 15, 2009


Finally! Geez....I was reeeeealllly starting to be down about my job. I was freaking out. Leave it to freaking Valentine's Day for it to redeem itself!!

I had a wonderful morning at home with my love and my animals. Then work was awesome! My hair was good tonight, I got lots of compliments on it. My outfit was completely adorable (My friend at KittenStitches from previous post), and it was just a great vibe!!

I even got mad at my DJ for a sec because I was doing Double Trouble (2 girls dance together) with another girl and each set he would announce her name but not mine!! Geez man, your job isnt that hard....just gets the names right and play the music.

I got over it though because my night was going so well that I only cared for half a second, then I coulda cared fucking less =)

I need to shower and get to bed though because B and I are going out for sunday breakfast in the morning! Yay!


Saturday, February 14, 2009


Work was better last night than it has been in a while for me. I wasnt scared to talk to people in the beginning of the night. My nerves were actually fairly good. It was probably the margarita I had =)

Towards the middlish-end of the night I was getting BORED and I was tired of being rejected so I kind of gave up. oh well.

Tonight I will just try not to get discouraged with all the "no thank yous" and the "maybe laters"

Actually....I felt like the more I hung out with guys and was in a good mood the faster the time went by =)

oh! My friend made a Valentines outfit for me!! She is an awesome designer/seamstress chick :) We took a picture of it and maybe I can post it for ya'll to look at later..... Go to her website and check out her stuff!!!!


Thursday, February 12, 2009

Tips for a Romatic Valentine's Day

1. Make your own valentine for her/him. Its not hard...just get some construction paper, markers and Elmers glue. If you wanna REALLY seal the deal, write her a short love letter or poem on it. Just make sure it expresses your personality.

2. Get an old shoebox, tape red construction paper all around the top and sides (or whatever color you prefer) and fill the box with favorite photographs, love letters, keepsakes from special occasions, movie tickets...etc.

3. Make an old skool CD of your favorite songs (don't forget to add the really cheesy, mushy songs for some laughs). Buy some Classic love movies or some of her all time favs and wrap them all together with red ribbon.

4. You can't go wrong with Jewelry. Its always a favorite. For the woman in your life, buy a heart-shaped locket and put a picture of yourself in it. Personalize the locket with her initialls so she’ll have something to wear that’s hers alone. It makes it extra special. Give it to her as shes getting dressed to go out to cant lose =)

5. Give her flowers. Not just a plain dozen of red roses. Try white roses....they mean eternal love and loyalty. Plus, they will look great on your counter all week and they will remind her how much you love her everytime she walks by.

6. I'm a big fan of this one: Make your honey's favorite dinner and serve it on a romantically set table and dine by candlelight on Valentine’s Day. Even if you are not a great cook or have never done it let me tell you- you are already WAY ahead of the game because at least u tried! Anyone can make a reservation for petes sake.

7. Give the man in your life a personalized gift for his favorite hobby. Your man loves Football? Buy him a new pigskin and deliver it to him topless =)

8. These days, just having time alone together is precious. Plan a romantic getaway. Even if its just spending the day lounging in the backyard together....

9. If you are planning on asking her to marry you (so cliche), then hide the engagement ring in a box of candy or in a flute filled with champagne. Dont overthink the proposal...your nerves will be going full speed as it is....just keep it simple...

10. If you want to propose at home(much better idea), sprinkle rose petals around the house. and light as many candles as you can to set the mood. You will know when the time is right =)



I was just going back thru some of my post and re-reading them.

Damn, I'm moody!


When it rains it pours....

Ok so maybe it's not THAT bad. But damn...where did all the money go?? I used to make a good fairly decent average of 3-4oo bucks a shift. NOW I'm lucky to make 200 bucks on a Saturday night.

Now I will say- Strippers are the best complainers. When its good- Its REAL good. REAL good. But man oh man when its bad.....its shit.

Everyone just wants to hang out and drink lately and nobody wants to buy dances and have fun!!!!!

This "economy" crap can suck it.

Maybe its my attitude. But frankly, I don't care. I'd rather stay home.

I need to start working out again and clear my head a little.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009


Well it snowed here today! Not much but enough to make everything nasty and muddy outside. B and I stayed in and watched the movie, "Frank and Miri make a Porno" It was pretty funny! We enjoyed it and I made Beef Stew in the crockpot for dinner....Now we are just laying here listening to the fire crackle....

work last weekend was HELLISH. This week I got Wed, Fri and Sat so maybe that will be better for me having the week broken up a bit more...

My mom may be in Denver on Sunday so it would be cool to see her!!
Anyway, I made some changes to my blog and I posted a list of all the blogs I have been following ....I am always looking for new stuff to zone out on and read....

Things I am interested in:

Stripping and/or Strippers
Money management
Funny stuff
Specifically Chihuahuas
Fitness (well...trying to get more into it)
Beauty/Skincare Products


There's so much crap out there that I am interested in but that is just a dent in some topics of blogs I have been searching lately.....if anyone knows of any good ones out there lemme know...

You can also friend me on MySpace


Sunday, February 8, 2009

Thank you 5 HTP

After my horrible anxiety the Friday night my friend gave me a 5 HTP pill. Its a natural mood enhancer you can buy at Walmart...She takes one @ 7 and it last her all night so thats what I did.

It definetly works. I have taken them before but its been a while. I was in a really great mood consistently all night with no alcohol!!! It was great! Tonight I will take another.....Drink water and eat with it bc it can give you a headache if you take too much or whatever... This pic above is a 100 mg but I think I took a 50 mg. (?) last night and it suited me just fine...
ANYWAY- it was SUPER crowded at work last night again. Abunch of asshole bachelor parties and lots of women last night! Drunk fun women :) So that was good. I ended up making only 250 bucks but...meh, Im happy.
When I woke up this morning B had made me breakfast !!! yay!! Eggs and bacon and potatoes :) And a big glass of ice cold chocolate milk. He spoils me!
My body is sooo sore so I may take an extra long hot bath before work tonight...and maybe a nap beforehand too..

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Completely Anti Social

Last night in my club was awesome. It was busy and everyone was nice and all the girls were getting dance after dance......except me.

I mean- I did alright. I'm really happy with what I made BUT I am not very happy with myself. I could have been more social. I should've been more social. I probably could've doubled what I made had I just walked up to people and hung out and been fun! Instead I walked in feeling really great anf hot and pumped...then the anxiety started creeeeeeeping up on me. Do I look ok? Do these guys even have money? (obviously they did bc everyone else made their money) Am I gonna say the right thing? I really just got so nervous that all I could do was sit downstairs by my locker texting my babe. He kept saying, "Its ok...just go up there and smile and be yourself....If you can't then just come home" I'm pathetic.

So a few times in the night when I got up enough courage to talk to people then I would get dances. Or a few extra tips on my stage set. So I know I can do it- Its just.....after almost 7 years of dancing I am SOOOOO over it. I'm just not good at it anymore. My mind is always somewhere else. Well I guess I shouldnt say that bc when I am on the ball- I do great. Its just so hard to get on the ball these days.

The reason I got sent home a while back is bc my boss said I was wasted (If I drink-its usually one MAYBE 2 glasses of wine all night) and yelled at a customer. ugh. Soooooo I though about having a glass of wine last night to take the edge away and become a little more social but I didnt bc I was too scared to go ask him for a drink ticket!!! lol.

I CANNOT let this happen to me again tonight. I need to try and relax better bc I cant put myself through that again!! My stomach was in knots I was getting hot fucking flashes I swear and Im only 24. =)

I can do this I can do this

Lately Ive been super self concious too. All the girls at my job are so pretty and tan and blonde. Dont get me wrong- I know Im a beatuiful girl and I have a great body (some days) but I dunno....Their attitudes really take them that extra mile. I need an attitude adjustment. I need something. It seems guys love the "stripper" type and I just cant fake it lately.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Back to work

I haven't worked in 2 weeks...and the last night I was there my boss was really pissed at me and sent me home early. Ugh. I am dreading going in tonight but I NEED the money and I can't just hide out in my house forever which is what I really want to do. Everyone has told me how shitty it has been in there so I am not happy about that either. And I am just not ready for all the girls and the music and the dorky old men and the rude obnoxious DJ and THE DRIVE (I drive 1 hour to work and another hour home at 3 am ugh)

I guess I should think about the things I am excited about : The dressing up part =) I love the hair and makeup and eyelashes and all of that. I don't wear anything when I am home because B prefers me with a naked face. But when I get the chance to glam up I really love it. Maybe I should take a pic tonight and post it on here? ANYWAY- I also am very excited to see the few particular girls that are my friends and I trust and they love me back. Mostly just V and P =) I am excited for the attention!!!!! I love when the guys stare at me like I am the sexiest thing they have ever seen- even though that's usually overshadowed by the cheesy song that's playing- and the lame 1 dollar tip he just gave me =( Most of all I will be happy to come home with some cash in my pocket $$$$$ I hope. Cross your fingers.

With all this said- I am not going to get myself all worked up and anxious. Mostly just anxious about the drive. It can be really long and nerve wracking driving down that highway at 6 o'clock in the evening on a Friday night. Luckily when I get off work at 3 am the drive will be super easy and fine since I will be the only one on the road. I am going to light a candle and do my makeup in my living room with my babe (who came home last night yipppee) and drink some hot tea.

Deep Breaths. No anxiety attacks.


Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Still not feeling it

Its a gorgeous day out, I've had plenty of rest (2 weeks worth) and yet, I still don't feel like doing anything :(

I should go to work considering all my bills are late right now and B is gone anyway. I'm scheduled on Friday, Saturday and Sunday so I'll just wait and go in then...

My chihuahua has been growing SO fast! She is 3.1 lbs now =D Yesterday I threw the ball in the backyard for a good hour and she just raaaaaaan her little heart out! Maybe we will go and do it again today.

Other than that, I have nothing interesting to talk about. xoxo

Tuesday, February 3, 2009


Haven't really felt like writing since I got home. I have had a terrible headache and I've been pumped up on NyQuil and its not helping...ugh.

B had to leave as soon as I got home. He'll be gone working in Idaho for at least a week. BOO! I only got to see hi for a few hours when I got home then he had to go.... =( I miss him badly.

From what I've been hearing from my friends the club totally sucked while I was I'm not looking forward to that either.

Basically I have no happy news. I am pretty much just sad and lonely bc I miss everyone ='(

My animals keep me company and i just LOVE them. They make me smile when I'm sad.